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Tuesday, February 17, 2015

I like HEALED women who know what damaged looks like

I’m sorry I saw 50 Shades of Grey.  I’ve been processing for the last 5 days and saying things to other people like, “I was just an ignorant fool, I had no idea that movie was about pedophilia and molestation,” or “What is wrong with me, I think I was just a tired mom desperate for a girls night.”  Bottom Line:  I WAS AN IDIOT!

…I said I was sorry to my man for opening my heart to that insanity.  My husband forgave me but I really hope my daughter never ever finds out I filled my mind with that smut as I was trying to form a worldview for her as I raised her.  I hope my mom doesn't creep on my facebook and find out I went because she raised me better than that - and my dad protected me from that nonsense.  I've done my upbringing wrong.  

After processing here’s my final thoughts and I’ll try and keep it brief since everyone else like Relevant Magazine has explained it much better than I.  I went to college.  There I spent enough time with drunk girls crying to realize about all of us were damaged, and more than 2 out of 10 of my friends had been sexually abused or emotionally messed up by men in some way.  So here we are – a society of damaged women expected to have a healthy worldview on how sex, intimacy, and relationships get portrayed in media and in our lives.  Do you blame any of us damaged women for running to see a film to “figure it out?”  These educated, smart, beautiful women are confused because – we’re all 50 shades of F*$#’d up.  For me, it comes down to the same points we make about Human Trafficking – you can’t heal girls who’ve been trafficked – but you sure can fight the battle of men who are purchasing these women.  You can start by educating women and men to live whole and healed lives. 

I hope women who liked that movie pursue healing of their hearts.  I feel deep compassion for anyone who identified with that film.  I cried this week thinking about how many women I know who’ve been molested.  Objectified. Confused.  Damaged.  At one point, my friend leaned over and said to me, “We’re supposed to see molestation as sexy now?” That’s the point I woke up and realized I should be walking out of that flick. 

Final thing – please talk to anyone you know who saw this movie.  Find out their story and how you can be a part of their healing.  We’re a damaged people, lets try and heal.

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